The Collaborative Divorce Center

A Deeper Dive into Conflict

A Deeper Dive into Conflict Everywhere these days, it seems that people are having a harder time finding the difference between conflict that is productive, useful, and restorative and conflict that is destructive, useless, and harmful. I often hear about situations in which one person, unable to talk about what is bothering them, lets a […]

Thoughts from Adult Children of Divorce

Thoughts from Adult Children of Divorce For those of you who “stay together for the children” and who think that the end of a marriage does not affect adult children consider these statements: “My parents, who have been married for 34 years, are getting a divorce. The reasons for it are valid. It is the […]

There are a lot of things that you do not control

There are a lot of things that you do not control You don’t get to choose your parentsYou don’t get to pick the country you are born inYou don’t get to pick your given talent You don’t get to choose where you start, but you can change where you go: Integrity is a choiceKindness is […]

Co-Parenting Warning Signs

Co-Parenting Warning Signs Eight questions to ask if you are struggling to co-parent well. If you answered yes to one or more of these questions you might want to discuss this with a family mediator or mental health professional. Contact us and we can help point you in the right direction.

The Very Definition of Divorce

The Very Definition of Divorce The root of the word “divorce” comes from the Latin word “divortere” which means to turn in different directions. There is some comfort in the simple idea of two people having traveled in the same direction and now one or both are going in different directions. However, the challenge of […]

DIVORCING DIFFERENTLY

DIVORCING DIFFERENTLY What if I didn’t blame my partner for anything and held myself 100 percent accountable? What if I checked my own stuff at the door and put my kids first? What if I reminded myself of the things about my partner that I like and fostered the friendship? What if? If you could […]

Still More on Perspective

Still More on Perspective If you’re stuck, change your perspective. What you see from 20,000 feet is very different from what you see from 2 feet. Different perspectives reveal different solutions. This is especially true with the problems that need to be solved during a divorce. People who make money off of your pain and […]

Words are Powerful!

Words are Powerful! How would you describe divorce? Most people would use words like fight, loss, adversarial, traumatic, expensive, conflict, scary, never-ending, and even destructive. Not me. When I think about how I facilitate the transition from married to single, here are the words that describe how I do divorce: EmpoweredHolisticParadigm-ShiftUpliftSupportPracticalMetamorphosisTransformIndividualizedPersonalizedCustomAll InclusiveFull CircleTransitionsFocusedRenewalRestoration It is […]

How to Know When Your Relationship Is Over

How to Know When Your Relationship Is Over The New Year is a time when many people re-evaluate many things, including their marriage, especially if times have been rough. I have been working this month on helping folks figure out whether or not to divorce. It is one of the hardest decisions you ever have […]

A Word About New Year’s Resolutions

A Word About New Year’s Resolutions I have never been a fan of New Year’s resolutions but I could never really express why. This week, I found someone who hit the nail on the head for me. Roger Rosenblatt wrote an opinion piece that was published in the New York Times and here is what […]